I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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