why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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