College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We don't watch enough power rangers
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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