I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
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