Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
