We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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