Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
