If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
