PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
