i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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