I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
