Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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