dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
