And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
