Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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