all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
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