where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
