Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
