I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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