Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I am spending my child support on dildos
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
