So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
