Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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