Where are you?
In a non slutty way
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
