It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
