I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Randomize
