Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
