I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
