whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
