Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
