he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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