It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
