thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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