no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
