Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
BRING THE BAGELS
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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