used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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