no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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