How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize