My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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