I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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