I hate your face
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
