it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
