Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
