problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
