No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
