she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
