Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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