You made me cry and you don't even care
plz talk dirty to me
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
