So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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