Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
