Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Randomize
